Some Jokes in this thread MAY NOT BE suitable for younger members of the forum in their nature!
Well, so many jokes to share, and I did'nt wanted to mess up the whole place, so why not make a single thread!!! THIS IS IT! Some Jokes may be shared already in other resources by others, my humble apologies in such a case!
Santa and Banta are two friends and Santa Singh has a very good job. Banta Singh is jobless and one day asks Santa to help him get some good Job. Santa singh says, "OK, next time we will apply together." and they do. On interview day, Santa Singh says, "First I will go inside and answer all questions except the last one, and after coming out, I will give you all the answers and questions. Then you go in and answer everything. You will get the Job. So, Santa goes in.
EMPLOYER: When did we get independence?
SANTA: Efforts started in 1857, but we got freedom in 1947.
EMPLOYER: Good. Who is our PM?
SANTA: It changes daily and these days its Manmohan Singh.
EMPLOYER: Ok, last question, What's India's population?
SANTA: (He was not to reply the last one so he says) Good Question, Research is going on, and when I know, I will tell you, Sir.
Now he comes out and tells the questions and answers to Banta Singh. Banta Singh True SARDAR that he is) remembers all answers and forgets the questions. He goes in Now.
EMPLOYER: When were you born?
BANTA: Efforts started in 1857, but got freedom in 1947.
EMPLOYER: What???? Who is your father?
BANTA: It changes daily and these days its Manmohan Singh.
EMPLOYER (Now quite upset): Are you mad Mr.Banta?
BANTA: Good Question. Research is going on, and when I know, I will tell you Sir.
Nice one admin,i was sad today but because of you nice jokes it made me fell good.i hope other member likes your jokes as i did.
haha. i dont have that many good jokes. im not that funny, just have alot of inside jokes.
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip.
After a good meal and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night and went to sleep.
Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend. "Watson, look up and tell me what you see."
Watson replied, "I see millions and millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?"
Watson pondered for a minute. "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Why, what does it tell YOU?"
Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke. "Watson, you idiot. Some jerk has stolen our tent."
ahahah funny one. ajee you area always makeing good post like those stories you post that have a moral to the story and now some of these funny jokes. well good job on keeping me laughing
The phone rings.
The lady of the house answers, "Yes?
Mrs. Ward, please."
"Speaking"
"Mrs. Ward, this is Doctor Jones at the Medical Testing Laboratory. When your Doctor sent your husband's samples to the lab, the samples from another Mr. Ward were sent as well and we are now uncertain which one is your husband's. Frankly, it is either bad or terrible."
"What do you mean?" Mrs. Ward asks.
"Well, one Mr. Ward has tested positive for Alzheimers disease (related to memory) and the other for AIDS. We can't tell which your husband's is"
"That's terrible! Can we do the test over?" questions Mrs. Ward.
"Normally, yes. But Medicare won't pay for these expensive tests more than once."
Well, what am I supposed to do now?"
"The people at Medicare recommend that you drop your husband off in the middle of town. If he finds his way home, don't sleep with him."
A stranger was seated next to Little Johnny on the plane when the
stranger turned to Little Johnny and said, "Let's talk. I've heard
that flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with
your fellow passenger." Little Johnny, who had just opened his book,
closed it slowly, and said to the stranger, "What would you like to
discuss?" "Oh, I don't know," said the stranger. "How about nuclear
power?" "OK," said Little Johnny. "That could be an interesting topic.
But let me ask you a question first. "A horse, a cow, and a deer all
eat grass. The same stuff. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a
cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried
grass. Why do you suppose that is?" "Jeez," said the stranger. "I have
no idea." "Well, then," said Little Johnny, "How is it that you feel
qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't know shit?"
NIce joke
v gathered in a large hall,
an angle askd us 2 write down r
sins b4 going to heaven,
b4 i cud start wrin mine,
i heard u shouting
Extra SHeet please:
Friend:how many women do u believe must a man mary?
MR.BEAN:16 friend:
why?MR.bean :Coz the priest says 4 richer,4 poor,4 better and 4 worse
New joke
A lady delivered twins surprisingly one is a boy and another is a dog howit is possible|?
Bcoz her husband is hutch dealer.... wherever u go out network follows
Well that seems that some other people also like to tell jokes other than me.. That seems great... LOL
lol fuuny posts...buh i thought this is HOT HUMOUR
I dont get it. :S Can someone explain this one to me; I know that Hutch is a mobile phone connection company...wots with the joke?
Heres mine one in Hindi:
aeroplane(to rocket):hey, how do you run so fast in the air?
rocket:when u will get fire on your back,then you will understand dude.
